The Proud Parents

There was a middle-aged couple who had two
stunningly beautiful teen-aged daughters

They decided to try one last time for the son
they always wanted.

After months of trying, the wife became pregnant
and sure enough, nine months later delivered a
healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see
his new son.

He took one look and was horrified to see the
ugliest child he had ever seen.

He went to his wife and said that there was no
way that he could be the father of that child.

"Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered."

Then he gave her a stern look and asked,

"Have you been fooling around on me?"

The wife just smiled sweetly and said,

.......... "Not this time."

Talk About Scared

Driving to the office this morning on the motor
way, I looked over to my left and there was a
woman in a brand new BMW.

She was doing 136 Kph with her face up next to
her rear view mirror putting on her eye liner!

I looked away for a couple seconds and when I
looked back she was halfway over in my lane!

Still working on that make-up !!!

It scared me so bad, (I'm a man) that I dropped
my electric shaver, which knocked the donut out
of my other hand.

In all the confusion of trying to straighten
out the car using my knees against the
steering wheel, my cell phone was knocked away
from my ear.

It fell into the coffee between my legs,
splashed and burned 'Big Jim and the Twins'!

Ruined the damn phone and
DISCONNECTED AN IMPORTANT CALL.

........... WOMEN DRIVERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!